(Great questions lead to great answers; weak questions, weak ones.)


“Am I the average of the five people I hang around most?”

Coaching Point: It has been said by many for years that each of us are so influenced and shaped by the people closest to us that we become the average of the collection of them. Five is not a magic number; it’s an indication of the small number it takes to have a major impact on you.

To illustrate the reverse of this phenomenon notice that there are some people who you are repelled by. You don’t want to be around their energy, behavior, or expressed thoughts. They, then, have only a small effect on your average.

Through desire, habit or momentum you have settled into your most frequent relationships with a few folks. They have the most effect on who you are and who you are becoming. Very normal, but it’s healthy to examine those most influential relationships from time to time.

This Great Question does not mean to get judgmental and ‘rank’ them as to who is ‘above’ you and who is ‘below.’ That would be the opposite of connecting and not useful at all. Instead, it means to look with a clear eye at what you are receiving from them. For instance, you may notice that one of them, while not stimulating your intellect, has a heart the size of a small country and you find yourself lifted on a loving ‘escalator’ when you are in their presence.

Asking yourself this question periodically will help you optimize the value you receive from, and give to, your closest circle.

What is it that you are the average of? Is it what you want?


Copyright 2015 Steve Straus. All rights reserved.