(Distinctions are subtleties of language that, when gotten, cause a shift in a belief, behavior, value, or attitude.)


Willfulness can be about having a need. It can be a need to be first or to be right or superior. Willful people define themselves as better than others. They “know” the answer.

Willfulness is a tool of the ego that loves to live in the assumption of duality, of me versus them.

Willingness is to be open, engaging, embracing, including. Leaning into the unknown. Open to the richness embedded in uncertainty.

Willingness is about try-test-try. Looking for feedback versus fearing failure.

Willfulness excludes. Willingness includes.

Willfulness, scowls, judges, and lectures. Willingness smiles, engages, and learns.

Willful people need to change others. Willing people let what they learn change themselves.


Coaching Point: Have you enjoyed growing into your willingness?


Copyright 2025 Steve Straus. All rights reserved.